Child development is alway sensitive topic and it may be a very daunting for some parents, especially when it comes to child discipline. Here are some thoughts of how the effect of the child discipline can have a lasting impact on your child.
Child discipline is often used as an equivalent for child love. While the parents wish all the best for their children, there are some subtle character-formation effects as a result of too much child discipline.
It is the common understanding that the child discipline refers to various methods employed by the parents or the supervisor to prevent children’s behavioural problems that my appear in the future.
By applying various kinds of discipline, parents teach the child how to develop new skills and embrace the useful knowledge. After all, child teaching is much like systematic set of instructions that will benefit the child and help mu develop as a valuable human being. However, some parents tend to do too much disciplining and it can be harmful for the child.
Too Much Child Discipline Can Be Harmful
Some child discipline is necessary for it helps your child to live in the society. This takes time, love and patience. Impatient parents get frustrated when a child does not obey or behave. They tend to discipline or even punish the child and impose on them hard motivation. Bur all they got is external motivation, not self-motivation.
External motivation is guided by fear and the feeling of guilt. Self-motivation is guided by love, trust and empowerment. Externally motivated children tend to submit to desired behaviour only to avoid being punished. Late in life they may develop the need to get approval in everything they do or cheat with the attitude of not getting caught.
If the discipline was regularly applied publicly, in front of the others, the child will lack the ability to stand up for himself and will be of a low self esteem. To avoid this, parents should avoid such kind of disciplining method even in front of siblings, cousins or close friends of the child.
To get a child self-motivated one needs to show them that there are valuable and very important to the whole family and give them lots of attention they need.
Because the parents are bigger and stronger and the child is depending on them, it’s easy to apply force in disciplining. But that will later bring much power-struggles and it will prove ineffective. Instead, parents should remove all kinds of punishments like grounding, withdrawal of privileges, yelling or threatening (God forbid spanking).
Effective child discipline helps child development and it doesn’t generate shame or the feelings of guilt, abandonment and a loss of trust.
Give Them More Attention And Praise
If the child misbehaves or gets angry really quickly, he is sending the message the parents that he needs more attention and positive appreciation. Because it gets parens’s attention when misbehaving, the child uses it to get them “interested” in him and his needs.
The more the parents are responsive, warm and supporting, the child will get more attention-time and will less misbehave. Praising the good behaving will also improve the positive behaviour.
Most parents do not offer attention to their children when they are behaving appropriately, but are right there when the child does something not so well. The child observes this and when he wants the attention, he misbehaves to get it. With the increasing of the misbehaviour they increase the amount of attention they are getting.
To avoid this a parent should constantly have an eye on the child and observe what the child does, fells or communicates. The proper way (especially when the child behaves nicely) is to acknowledge what the child did and give him a lots of attention and praise his abilities, effort and intention. Describe and praise, smile and laugh – it makes wonders in child development and teaching.